Folklore Frontiers - No 050

Magazine Overview

Title: Folklore Frontiers
Issue: No. 50
Date: August 2005
Publisher: Paul Screeton

Folklore Frontiers is an independent magazine dedicated to exploring various aspects of folklore, with a particular focus on contemporary legends, ancient and modern traditions, and lore. The magazine is edited and published by Paul Screeton, with the address provided as 5 Egton Drive, Seaton Carew, Hartlepool, TS25 2AT. Subscriptions for three issues are priced at £6, payable to P. Screeton.

Cover Story and Lead Articles

The cover of this issue prominently features the headline "What Diana was like in bed by James Hewitt," suggesting a focus on celebrity gossip and potentially controversial revelations. The main image on the cover depicts a man and a woman, alongside a caricature of a man.

J.M.W. Turner and Artistic Mythologizing

This issue's cover artist is J.M.W. Turner (1775-1881), with the illustration sourced from 'Art Ain't all Paint' by Jan Gordon & H.M. Bateman. The magazine delves into Turner's life, describing him as a mystery who made significant sums from his daring landscapes and delicate watercolors but lived in squalor with unattractive mistresses. He quarreled with engravers, neglected prints, and traveled incessantly, even disguising himself as a retired sea-captain. Despite leaving much of his work and fortune to a home for distressed artists, lawyers reportedly took the latter. The issue references an article by Morgan Falconer in The Times about artists' fascination with snow, specifically Turner's 'Snowstorm: Steamboat off a Harbour's Mouth.' Falconer noted Turner's story of being lashed to the mast during a storm, a tale questioned by critics who suggested he used unconventional materials like cream or chocolate in his paintings.

The Hartlepool Monkey-Hanging Legend

The magazine revisits the Hartlepool monkey-hanging legend, referencing the book 'Who Hung The Monkey?' by the author. A recent story links the legend to a foot-long bone found on Seaton Carew beach. Police investigated but lost interest when a pathologist identified it as belonging to a monkey or gorilla. Dr. Peter Rowley-Conwy of Durham University suggested it could be from a ship's pet. However, further analysis revealed it was a red deer shin bone dating back at least 6,000 years, from a time when Britain was part of mainland Europe.

New 'Bermuda Triangles' in the UK

Paranormal researchers, commissioned by Sky Travel for their 'Mysterious World' series, have identified three new areas in the UK that exhibit similar phenomena to the Bermuda Triangle. These are the Penzance Triangle (Cornwall), the York Triangle (Yorkshire), and the Norfolk Triangle. The Penzance Triangle is noted for frequent UFO and ghost sightings, as well as sightings of sea creatures like Morgawr and the Owlman. The York Triangle has also seen numerous UFO and ghost sightings, including a procession of Roman soldiers. The Norfolk Triangle has an above-average level of UFO sightings and reports of a headless ghost of Anne Boleyn. Researchers suggest that historical events like battles, plagues, and tragedy in these areas, along with ley-lines, may contribute to increased paranormal activity.

Newslines and Anecdotes

The "Newslines" section covers a variety of curious and often bizarre anecdotes:

• Whitsuntide Bank Holiday Incident: A tragic accident in Oxford involving an overcrowded hatchback resulted in the deaths of four boys.
• Jason Manford and Urban Legends: Comedian Jason Manford discusses his debut solo show at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, focusing on urban legends and his interest in scary myths.
• Trainspotting and Sexuality: A lengthy piece explores the often-sexualized and derogatory connotations associated with trainspotting, citing various media reports and personal anecdotes that link the hobby to anal retention, effeminacy, and even pedophilia. It includes references to Piers Morgan, Gary Bushell, and Andrew Martin.
• Urine Therapy: Ron Moorhouse claims that drinking his own urine has stopped his persistent epilepsy fits, citing biblical references. However, Dr. Chris Steele warns against this practice.
• Ozzy Osbourne and Nikki Sixx Contest: An anecdote describes a drunken contest between Ozzy Osbourne and Nikki Sixx involving cocaine and urine.
• 'Chavs' and Social Class: The article discusses the term 'chavs' as a derogatory label for a perceived underclass, noting a defense of Cheltenham from its mayor.
• Global Warming Skepticism: Professor Philip Stott is quoted expressing skepticism about human-caused catastrophic climate change, noting historical periods of warmth and cold.
• Tom Cruise's 'Top Gun' Anecdote: Nigel Famdale recounts a story about two identical doorframes at Paramount Studios used in 'Top Gun' for Tom Cruise and Kelly McGillis.
• Masturbation and Sperm Quality: Research by Professor Leigh Simmons suggests that looking at pornography increases the quality and vigor of men's sperm, linking it to evolutionary 'sperm competition'.
• Catherine the Great Myth: The article debunks the myth that Catherine the Great died attempting sexual intercourse with a horse, stating she died of a stroke.
• The Hum Phenomenon: The article explores the 'hum' sound, suggesting potential medical origins such as high blood pressure or metabolic disorders, citing accounts from readers.
• Britart and Chocolate Casts: Prudence Staite wins £5,000 to create chocolate casts of her breasts and bum for an exhibition.
• Heinz Advert Controversy: A Heinz advert for salad cream sparked complaints in Swindon, with residents claiming it implied the town was overrun with criminals.
• Mischief and Fake Advert: An 83-year-old man was inundated with calls after his ex-boyfriend placed a fake advert for sex in his name.
• Hunting Ley Misuses: A brief mention of a character in 'New Tricks' referencing 'ley-lines'.

Other Features

• Andy Capp Cartoon: A humorous cartoon strip featuring Andy Capp discussing reincarnation.
• Poetry: A short poem by 'TURNER' is included.
• 'Look No Hands' Article: A brief, sexually suggestive piece by Simon Barrett.

Recurring Themes and Editorial Stance

The magazine consistently explores themes of urban legends, contemporary folklore, unexplained phenomena (UFOs, ghosts), and often sensationalized or bizarre anecdotes from popular culture and news. The editorial stance appears to be one of curiosity and a willingness to report on unusual or controversial topics, often with a slightly irreverent or skeptical tone, as seen in the debunking of myths and the critical examination of sensational claims. There is a recurring interest in the intersection of folklore with celebrity culture and historical events.

This issue of The Times, dated July 9, 2005, with the identifier 9.07.05 and volume 46:1, is published by Times Newspapers Ltd and priced at £3.60. The cover headline is "Stand up and fight, Mr Cabbie!". The document type is a magazine issue.

Key Articles and Features

Food Detective: Lunchtime Legends

Sheila Keating explores the origins of various foods and recipes, often based on urban legends. She notes the proliferation of food-related websites and their trivia sections. The origin of chocolate-chip cookies is attributed to Ruth Wakefield in Massachusetts in 1930, who ran out of baking chocolate and used semi-sweet chocolate chips. Crisps are said to have been invented by George Crum at the Moon Lake Lodge in Saratoga Springs when a customer repeatedly sent back his chips for not being thin enough. He sliced potatoes paper-thin and fried them, creating "Saratoga Chips". The origin of tarte tatin is attributed to the Tatin sisters who improvised by baking caramelised apples in pastry when they forgot to make the tart. Beef carpaccio dates back to Harry's Bar in Venice in 1950, created for a customer on a special diet. Doughnuts' origin is linked to a 19th-century sea captain who put pieces of fried dough on the spokes of the ship's wheel to keep them from flying around, with the cook later making them with holes. The legend of hot dogs originating in New York in 1901 from dachshund sausages is also recounted, with a cartoonist captioning it "hot dog" due to misspelling.

Proto-Legends

This section compiles various anecdotal stories and urban legends. One tale involves two old women on the North Yorkshire Moors Railway who mistakenly went to Grosmont instead of Pickering, and were told they would have to pay for a taxi to get to Pickering. The story mentions Vernon Cripps, a taxi owner from the TV series "Heartbeat". Another anecdote recounts Patrice Lumumba's declaration to King Baudoin of Belgium, "We are no longer your monkeys," and Richard Nixon's awkward encounter in Ghana with a man from Alabama. Joseph Berkas, an Austrian philatelist, received an absolute discharge in Vienna after a misunderstanding involving his landlady's daughter and a missing stamp. A police chase in Holland for a van suspected of kidnapping turned out to be an elaborate sex game. Petru Cioaba from Romania lost his wife and mistress after mixing up their surprise presents. Sandi Toksvig recalled Winston Churchill's witty remark about a submerged door marked "WC". A case from South Korea reports the first death by computer game, where a 28-year-old died of heart failure after a 50-hour marathon.

James Hewitt: The wit and wisdom of James Hewitt

This feature interviews Major James Hewitt, discussing his reputation as a "ladies' man" and his resemblance to Prince Harry. Hewitt speaks about a brief encounter with Jodie Marsh and his physical similarity to Prince Harry, stating he has "absolutely nothing to say" on the matter. He also reflects on Princess Diana, describing their relationship as "exciting and sexy because it was risky" and calling her a "dashing lady". The article also touches on his participation in an ITV programme called "Celebrity Wrestling".

Nigel Farndale: Eddie Izzard, James Hewitt, and Prince Harry

Nigel Farndale discusses Eddie Izzard's theory of coolness and draws a parallel to James Hewitt, suggesting Hewitt might be less dim than he appears. He recounts a story where Hewitt, when asked to pose in front of a car wreck for a photoshoot, asked "why not?" and later expressed surprise when told it was a sick joke. Farndale also mentions Prince Harry goose-stepping at the royal wedding, a detail he found surprising was not widely reported.

Ben Thompson: Prince Harry and Simone Simmons

Ben Thompson discusses a television show featuring Major James Hewitt and a woman. He also references a book by Simone Simmons, Princess Diana's former therapist, who claims Diana was ordered to arrange a blood test for Harry to prove Hewitt was not his father. The article also mentions William and that Diana awarded Charles "1 out of 10 for love-making".

Stand up and fight, Mr Cabbie!

This article by Melissa Kite recounts an incident where a black-cab driver yelled at her for using her mobile phone at a petrol station, warning of an explosion. Kite investigates this claim and finds evidence that mobile phone warnings at petrol stations are an urban myth, with sparks more likely to come from static electricity. The article criticizes the proliferation of health-and-safety regulations, citing examples like a proposal for elderly people to have napkins with helpline numbers and a market town's flower show cancellation due to lack of licensed stewards.

Books Reviews

• EXPLORE PHANTOM BLACK DOGS edited by Bob Trubshaw: This book is described as a comprehensive introduction to the area of folklore concerning phantom black dogs. It covers various tales and similarities in narratives, including the dual nature of the 'shuck' as a guardian or death portent. The review notes the author's emphasis on the coherence of humanity and the importance of storytelling. It also includes a critique of Simon J. Sherwood's chapter on a psychological approach and Alby Stone's comments on the Greyfriars Bobby myth.
• STORIES THAT CRAFTED THE WORLD by Adrian Beckingham: This book is presented as a positive exploration of creation myths from indigenous peoples worldwide. The review highlights its emphasis on the coherence of humanity and the power of storytelling to convey universal truths. It also includes reflections from astronomer Sir Bernard Lovell on the uncertainty surrounding the Big Bang and black holes.

Magazines

This section provides brief reviews of various magazines:

• FORTEAN TIMES: Reviews issues covering the Da Vinci Code, Templar tunnels, electronic voice phenomena, disappearing people, Rasputin, the Dictionary of the Damned, unhygenic hair-dryers, illusions, giraffe-necked women, eels, tsunami weirdness, and black dog terrors.
• AMSKAYA: Reviews issues featuring Paul Screeton's geomancy and railways article, Roman roads and leys, the Society of Ley Hunters, and leys in the vicinity of Essex and Middlesex.
• NORTHERN EARTH: Reviews issues discussing the solar hero myth, ancient burial mounds, faery, rock art, the folklore of the Settle & Carlisle line, marital lore, and Carlisle's 'cursing stone'.
• TOUCHSTONE: A newsletter of Surrey Earth Mysteries Group.
• MAGONIA: Reviews issues on the Swinging Sixties, UFOs, John Michell, Keith Richards, David Bowie, Flying Saucer Oz, Pierre Plantard, early humanity, and the inadequacy of theories about Gene May and the X-15 aircraft.
• MAGONIA Supplement: Reviews on the Carbondale, Pennsylvania case, and the Betty and Barney Hill abduction.

Recurring Themes and Editorial Stance

The magazine consistently explores themes of urban legends, folklore, historical anecdotes, and the paranormal. There is a critical stance towards sensationalism in media reporting and an interest in debunking myths, particularly those related to health and safety. The editorial stance appears to be one of curiosity and a desire to present diverse perspectives, often with a touch of skepticism towards unsubstantiated claims.