Folklore Frontiers - No 033

Magazine Overview

Title: Folklore Frontiers
Issue: 33
Date: September 1998
Publisher: Paul Screeton

This issue of Folklore Frontiers, edited and published by Paul Screeton, continues its exploration of folklore, urban belief tales, and contemporary culture. The magazine is based in Seaton Carew, Hartlepool, UK.

The Diary

Paul Screeton's 'Diary' section opens with observations on the 'wrong animal rights' phenomenon, noting instances of public outrage over alleged animal abuse, such as the case of 'chastity belts for bitches' and women storming a shop. He also highlights the rise of 'e-maillore' or 'weblore' as a new form of folklore, superseding photocopylore. A piece by John Tait looks back at the World Cup, referencing a claim about an Orange Order Ulster defence Force hitman being hired to assassinate Beckham. An 'Update' section revisits 'aural simulacra' and discusses 'auditory stabilisation' in relation to Brian Aldiss's work.

A Dip to Remember

This section features a light-hearted anecdote about Peter Mandelson mistaking mushy peas for avocado dip. It also includes a story about Tony Blair's early political career, advising him to order a pint in every bar and avoid 'bloody Perrier Water'.

Bra Game Fury Over Cruelty to Maggots

This news item reports on animal lovers protesting against a pub in Pitsea, Essex, for organizing 'wacky games nights' that included pouring live maggots into participants' bras. The pub boss, Mark Peters, defended the games, calling the protesters 'animal rights nutters'.

Marilyn Myth

A letter to the editor from Stephen Dorril questions the assertion that Marilyn Monroe was 'at least a size 16', citing her dress designer Billy Travilla who stated her measurements were 35-22-35, and arguing that her figure was not typical of 'nearly half the present female population'.

Wrong Animal Rights

By Paul Screeton

This extensive article examines various instances where animal rights activism has taken unusual or disproportionate forms, often fueled by imagination or misidentification. Screeton begins by acknowledging legitimate concerns but points to cases where beliefs have become exaggerated. He recounts several anecdotes:

• Taiwanese 'Miniature Dinosaurs': A pet shop owner claimed to have bred miniature dinosaurs using 'Jurassic Park technology', but they were revealed to be gerbils in dinosaur costumes.
• Baby Tyrannosaurus Rexes: A pet shop in Coulsdon, Surrey, advertised baby tyrannosaurus rexes, leading to customer orders.
• Dinosaur Steaks: A Southampton restaurant advertised 'dinosaur steaks', which led to a protest.
• Bristol Hippodrome: An advertisement for a live dinosaur show caused alarm, with the RSPCA inquiring if live animals were being used.
• 'Woolly Mammoth' Burgers: A butcher in Bournemouth sold 'woolly mammoth' burgers after finding fossilised elephant remains.
• Circus Animals: Animal rights activists mistook actors in animal suits (a gorilla and a 'dancing bear') for real animals.
• Juggling Tortoises: An entertainer was berated for juggling tortoises, which turned out to be realistic concrete models.
• Snake Racing: A nightclub manager had to explain that 'Racing Snakes' was a rock band, not actual snake racing.
• Frozen Chicken Bowling: A pub game involving bowling frozen chickens at skittles was criticized by animal welfare groups.
• Werewolves: Activists in Romania demanded that werewolves be put on the endangered species list, despite their non-existence.
• Stuffed Dogs: Reports of people breaking into cars to 'rescue' stuffed dogs, mistaking them for live animals.
• 'Parrot Pies': A TV show set up a bogus market stall selling 'parrot pies', which led to a complaint.
• Spray-Painted Parrots: An Australian was imprisoned for spray-painting common parrots to pass them off as valuable rare ones.
• Mechanical Parrots: A complaint about a slot machine parrot was investigated, revealing it was mechanical.
• Plastic Fish: A pub landlady was accused of cruelty for having a battery-operated plastic fish, mistaken for a real goldfish.
• 'Invisible' Fish: A pet shop owner created a hoax with an 'invisible Malayan ghost fish', which attracted a crowd.

Screeton concludes that these stories, while sometimes rooted in genuine concerns, often take on a folkloric hue due to misidentification and exaggeration.

UFO

Man believed aliens were after him

This news report details the inquest of Patrick Cleaves, a former miner who died from a self-inflicted stab wound. He had been complaining of chest pains, which he attributed to alien laser beams. The coroner recorded a verdict of accidental death, believing he did not intend to harm himself. His friend and a police officer testified that Cleaves was convinced he was being watched by aliens and that beams were burning his chest.

The Box Hill Tunnel: An Anorak's Paradise or a Passage to Narnia

By Rory Lushman

This article investigates the persistent rumors surrounding the Box Hill Tunnel in Wiltshire, a region known for UFO activity and crop circles. Lushman explores the idea of a secret tunnel connected to the main line, potentially leading to Rudloe Manor. He discusses the logistical challenges of accessing such a tunnel via railway points and the possibility of it being used for shunting or storing locomotives.

• Railway Rumors: Rail employees often speak of a secret tunnel within Box Hill Tunnel, with some believing it's a hiding place for UFOs or a place to learn more about them. Matthew Williams suggests UFO reports are sent to Rudloe Manor.
• The Strategic Reserve: This is described as a rumored oubliette for old steam engines, with tales of locomotives disappearing without a trace. The theory suggests these engines might be stored there, possibly as a response to the oil crisis or for protection against nuclear strikes.
• Underground Facility: Speculation exists about a large underground complex with a long platform and marshalling yard, capable of holding over 4000 people, possibly chosen for its remoteness and proximity to military locations and runways.
• Practicality of Steam Engines: The article questions the practicality of using steam engines in an emergency, noting the long time required to get them up to steam.
• Alternative Entrances: The article discusses potential entry points, including a disused cutting near Chippenham and a tunnel at Middle Hill, suggesting confusion might arise between different tunnel locations.
• Signalling Systems: Lushman's contact, who worked in railway signalling, states that the automatic signalling system in Box Hill Tunnel would prevent any points for a secret entrance within the tunnel itself.
• Rudloe Manor Connection: While Rudloe Manor is a focal point for UFO enthusiasts, the article concludes that there is little concrete evidence of a significant rail connection to it, despite rumors.
• 'Chinese Whispers': The author suggests that the Box Hill Tunnel rumors are a mix of speculation, wishful thinking, and 'Chinese whispers', with ufologists and rail enthusiasts seeing what they want to see.
• 'Wiltshire Soup' Recipe: A metaphorical recipe for a mystery soup, combining military bases, Rudloe 'bullshit', UFO rumors, and steam locomotives.

World Cup Gallery

This section discusses the 1998 World Cup, touching on conspiracy theories about the tournament being fixed, particularly concerning the French victory. It mentions Maradona's 'Hand of God' incident and the perceived lacklustre performance of the Brazilian team. The article also covers the intense media focus on David Beckham following his sending off, including rumors of a contract on his head. It highlights the passionate, and sometimes irrational, fervor of football fans, citing an incident where a fan threw himself in front of Peter Beardsley's car. The section also touches upon the concept of 'Organized Football Hooliganism' (OFH), discussing battle plans and tactics allegedly distributed to English fans, and the authorities' efforts to combat hooliganism. The 'Pot Hooligan Effect' theory is introduced, likening hooliganism to a Pot Noodle that becomes chaotic when 'hot water' (alcohol) is added. The section also briefly mentions an incident involving Gazza Gascoigne and Viv Graham, and a rare £1 coin commemorating the World Cup.

Letters

• Steve Sneyd writes about the 'Kilroy is Here' graffiti and a childhood version of a song about Hitler.
• John Tait contributes a short piece about a rare £1 coin.

Update

• EXCLUSIVE: Tattoo Mix-up: Guy Rawlins mistakenly received a tattoo of Jeremy Beadle instead of an anchor after the tattooist misunderstood his request.
• OH, THEY CAN BE SO VERY WUDE TO WOY: A humorous anecdote about Roy Jenkins's resignation speech and a heckler from Yorkshire.
• Mike Amos recounts a request for 'bog roll' at a tea hut, which was misinterpreted.
• Auberon Waugh's Senegal Visit: A story about Auberon Waugh being asked to speak on 'breast-feeding' in Senegal, only to discover his audience thought he was discussing 'press freedom'.
• In a roundabout way: This section discusses popular myths and stories, including a foreigner asking for directions to Abingdon, which turned out to be an old story.

silicon lore

This section discusses problems encountered with the 'Girl Friend' software series, detailing conflicts with other programs like 'Drinking Buddies' and 'Golf'. The author describes issues with installation, viruses, and resource allocation, noting the software's focus on appearance over functionality. It also mentions 'Girl Friend Plus', 'Wife 1.0', and 'Mother-In-Law' software, highlighting their resource demands and compatibility issues. A 'Reply' suggests installing 'MOS - the Morman Operating System' to manage multiple 'Wife' programs but warns of drawbacks like multiple 'Mother-In-Law' versions and resource errors.

Books

• THE A-Z OF NAMES IN ROCK by Mark Beech: A book exploring the origins of band and performer names, with anecdotes and trivia.
• LORD HIGH EXECUTIONER by Howard Engel: A historical account of John 'Babbacoombe' Lee, a man who survived multiple execution attempts, and a broader look at capital punishment.
• THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO UNUSUAL LEISURE by Stephen Jarvis: A collection of articles on various hobbies and interests, including earth mysteries, cryptozoology, and other esoteric pursuits.
• URI GELLER'S LITTLE BOOK OF MIND-POWER: A book offering techniques for mind-power and a chance to win a rock crystal.
• THE BARDIC SOURCE BOOK by John Matthews: A collection of texts by ancient Celtic bards.
• THE UNKNOWN ARTHUR by John Matthews: Retellings of Arthurian legends from original sources.
• CELTIC PILGRIMAGES: SITES, SEASONS & SAINTS by Elaine Gill and David Everett: A guide to sacred sites in Britain, Ireland, and Brittany, linked to the Celtic calendar.
• SPIRITS OF THE SACRED GROVE by Emma Restall Orr: A personal journey through the seasons from a modern druidess perspective.
• BE A GODDESS! by Francsca de Grandis: A guide to Celtic spells, self-healing, and prosperity.
• HOW TO CONNECT WITH YOUR SPIRITUAL GUIDE by LizaViemer: A practical guide to contacting one's spiritual guide.
• WHEN ORACLES SPEAK by Dianne Skafte: A book on receiving spiritual guidance through dreams and meditative states.
• DRAGON-SLAYING MYTHS ANCIENT AND MODERN by Bob Trubshaw: A guide to dragon mythology from pagan rituals to modern interpretations.
• SKY DRAGONS & CELESTIAL SERPENTS by Alastair McBeath: Explores dragon mythology, constellation naming, and astronomy.
• RATCLIFFE'S MEGATHESAURUS by Eric Ratcliffe: An alphabetical list of terms related to 'Meg' and 'Roaring', with quirky anecdotes.
• CASCADING COMETS: THE KEY TO ANCIENT MYSTERIES by Donald L. Cyr: A book exploring ancient mysteries related to comets.

Recurring Themes and Editorial Stance

The recurring themes in this issue of Folklore Frontiers include the exploration of contemporary urban legends and folklore, the often bizarre manifestations of animal rights activism, and the enduring fascination with mysteries such as the Box Hill Tunnel and UFOs. The magazine also touches upon the cultural impact of major events like the World Cup, examining conspiracy theories and social phenomena like hooliganism. The editorial stance appears to be one of critical inquiry, presenting various anecdotes and theories while often questioning their veracity and highlighting the role of exaggeration, misinterpretation, and 'Chinese whispers' in shaping these narratives. The magazine seems to encourage readers to think critically about the information presented, as evidenced by the concluding remarks on the Box Hill Tunnel article, which emphasizes the difficulty in discerning truth from lies in the face of sensationalism.

This document is page 20 of what appears to be a magazine or newsletter, likely titled 'Stonehenge Viewpoint', as indicated by the first review. The issue number is '20'. The content consists of reviews of three books, all published by Blandford.

Book Reviews

Landscapes of Legend by John Matthews & Michael J. Stead (£20)

This book is described as a continuation of reprints from Stonehenge Viewpoint, presented in a more compact size. Cyr is mentioned as developing his 'Vailian theory of cometary ice crystals' and its connection to megalithic rock art, prehistoric artifacts, and Greek architecture. The review highlights that 'Landscapes of Legend' features photographs that capture the spiritual nature of sacred sites, with colour illustrations doing justice to this aspect. John Matthews contributes informative texts, and the pictures are arranged into five categories: stone circles and standing stones; hill figures, forts, and Roman ways; a general category; medieval castles and halls; and the evolution from tombs to Durham Cathedral. The review notes that the Durham photograph is a 'cliched weir and museum with cathedral towering above' and points out a potential error in spelling 'Stockburn' as 'Sockburn' in relation to the dragon legend. It also mentions that only two pictures are 'idiosyncratic shots' – one of Craig-y-Ddinas and another of the Uffington white horse (or dragon). Overall, it is considered a fine example of a coffee table book suitable for an 'armchair geomant'.

Alchemy by Diana Fernando (Blandford, £18.99)

This review discusses the enduring fascination with alchemy, despite skepticism. The book is presented as a pathway to self-realization, going beyond the transmutation of base metal into gold. The author's 'alchemic quest' has resulted in a dictionary that balances laboratory operations and notable alchemists with the framework that made alchemy possible. It covers sacred places, brotherhoods, collectors, patrons, texts, publishers (noting printers are 'keen Freemasons'), and the language of alchemy. The reviewer questions the seriousness of a search for an elixir requiring 'semen and dung', but acknowledges the author's work is not 'po-faced' despite alchemy's historical secrecy. The book is illustrated with 160 of the author's line drawings and 12 colour plates, and is considered a valuable reference work that re-establishes alchemy as a holistic view of humanity and science.

Myths of the Middle Ages by Sabine Baring-Gould, edited by John Matthews (Blandford, £10.99)

This book is a selection of 12 stories from Reverend Sabine Baring-Gould's classic 1869 collection, 'Curious Myths'. The stories chosen by John Matthews for their merit include the search for the location of Eden, swan-maidens, the Sangreal, the story of the Welsh dog Gellert, the Man in the Moon, Prester John, and the Antichrist and Pope Joan. John Matthews provides introductory essays that offer background, context, and relevant historical or mythological origins. The reviewer notes that Baring-Gould may have been 'over-zealous in censoring some aspects of material he collected', but credits him for producing 'scholarly and fascinating work'.

Publication Details

The issue was printed by Emjay, located at 17 Langbank Avenue, Rise Park, Nottingham.

Recurring Themes and Editorial Stance

The reviews suggest a focus on esoteric subjects, ancient mysteries, folklore, and historical/mythological studies. The magazine appears to cater to an audience interested in alternative theories, ancient history, and spiritual or mystical traditions, as evidenced by the topics of cometary ice crystals, megalithic art, sacred places, alchemy, and medieval myths. The editorial stance seems to be one of serious engagement with these subjects, presenting them through book reviews that highlight scholarly and fascinating aspects, while also acknowledging potential eccentricities or historical criticisms.