The Cowflop Quarterly

Magazine Overview

Title: The Cowflop Quarterly
Issue: No. 4
Date: Friday, March 8, 1996
Publisher: Robert G. Todd
Price: $1,000.00

This issue of The Cowflop Quarterly, subtitled 'REPORTING ON UFOLOGICAL FRAUDS AND FANTASIES,' critically examines claims made by Stanton T. Friedman regarding the Roswell incident and the role of Lt. Gen. Nathan F. Twining. The magazine takes a skeptical stance towards UFOlogy, aiming to debunk what it terms 'frauds and fantasies.'

General Twining's Majical Mystery Tour

The lead article, 'GENERAL TWINING'S MAJICAL MYSTERY TOUR,' directly challenges Stanton T. Friedman's assertion that Lt. Gen. Nathan F. Twining's visit to New Mexico in July 1947 was a direct result of an alien spaceship crash on the 'Plains of San Agustin.' The article presents Air Force records indicating that Twining's visit was scheduled as part of a routine inspection and to attend the 'General Officers Special Three-Day Course' at Sandia Base, Albuquerque, from July 8th to 11th, 1947. This course was also to be attended by other high-ranking officers like Maj. Gen. Benjamin Chidlaw, Maj. Gen. Earle F. Partridge, and Brig. Gen. Samuel R. Brentnall. The article dismisses Friedman's claims that the inspection was 'suddenly laid on' and 'much too high-powered' as attempts to create a sinister narrative around mundane events.

Friedman's contention, as presented in the article, is that Twining's visit was prompted by a 'very important and sudden matter' connected to New Mexico, implying the alien crash. However, the magazine argues that Air Force documents clearly show Twining's trip was planned by June 5, 1947, at the latest, to accommodate the course schedule. The article also notes that Generals Twining, Chidlaw, and Thomas were seeking clearance for access to atomic energy information, suggesting their involvement in research and development activities made an inspection of the AMC R&D base at Alamogordo logical.

The article criticizes Friedman's methodology, describing it as 'concocting ridiculous scenarios to explain away indisputable facts' and manufacturing 'phony "Government documents"' to support his theories. It suggests that Friedman's 'Majical Mystery Tour' illustrates a method of creating UFO myths by misinterpreting archival data and official meetings.

Damage Control and Spin Artistry at Ye Olde Centre for UFO Propaganda: Much Ado About Nothing

This section focuses on the response of UFO organizations, specifically CUFOS (Center for UFO Studies) and its publication Irrational UFO Reporter (IUR), to the GAO Roswell report. The article criticizes an article by Mark Rodeghier and Mark Chesney titled 'What the GAO found: Nothing about much ado,' published in IUR. The 'Marks Brothers,' as they are referred to, found it 'intriguing and, perhaps, ominous' that the GAO could not find any outgoing messages from Roswell Army Air Field (RAAF), suggesting this was evidence of a cover-up.

The Cowflop Quarterly argues that the most reasonable explanation for the missing messages is that they never existed or were destroyed according to standard procedures. It points out that communications between RAAF and Fort Worth likely occurred via telephone, not teletype, and that the FBI teletype confirms telephonic conversations. The article refutes the 'Marks Brothers'' claim that conspirators removed incriminating materials, stating that if such messages existed, they would likely be found among the incoming messages of higher commands like the 8th Air Force or SAC.

The article also addresses the 'Marks Brothers'' surprise at the lack of CIA records keyed to 'Roswell' or 'Project Mogul.' It explains that Project Mogul was an experimental project that never became operational and was known by several other code names ('Rockfish,' 'MX-968,' 'Whitesmith,' 'Bequeath,' 'Centering,' 'Cottonseed,' and 'Blackheart'). Therefore, a search using 'Mogul' would be meaningless. The article dismisses the idea that the CIA would have detailed records on the day-to-day activities of such a project.

Regarding the 'Roswell' keyword, the article states that the FBI, not the CIA, was responsible for investigating domestic espionage. It suggests that any relevant cases would be filed under the perpetrators' names, not the location. The article criticizes the 'Marks Brothers'' belief that government agencies are 'super-efficient' and can retrieve any document at any time.

Furthermore, the article challenges Congressman Schiff's assertion that the Air Force acknowledged the crashed vehicle was not a weather balloon. It quotes the GAO report stating that 'Recent research indicates that the debris recovered from the ranch on July 7, 1947, was a weather balloon--but it was not being used strictly for weather purposes.' The article implies that Schiff and other 'true believers' are misinterpreting this statement.

Major Marcel Update

This section provides an update on Major Marcel, who has been accused of lying about his military service. The Federal Aviation Administration's Airmen Certification Branch has no record of a pilot's certificate for Major Marcel, despite his claims of being a private pilot since 1928. The article notes that Jerome Clark, 'editor' of the Irrational UFO Reporter, believes Marcel's lies about his military service are irrelevant to his claims about the Roswell incident, a stance the magazine finds convenient and questionable given the reliance on witness testimony in UFOlogy.

Recurring Themes and Editorial Stance

The recurring theme throughout this issue is the debunking of UFO conspiracy theories, particularly those surrounding the Roswell incident and the MJ-12 'hoax.' The magazine's editorial stance is highly critical of UFO proponents like Stanton Friedman, the 'Marks Brothers,' and Congressman Schiff, accusing them of misinterpreting evidence, fabricating documents, and promoting sensationalist narratives based on flawed logic. The Cowflop Quarterly emphasizes the importance of official records and rational explanations, contrasting them with what it perceives as the 'frauds and fantasies' of the UFO community. The publication appears to be dedicated to exposing what it views as misinformation and propaganda within the UFO field.